Meditation for Beginners: 20 Practical Tips for Understanding the Mind
The most
important habit I’ve formed in the last 10 years of forming habits is
meditation. Hands down, bar none.
Meditation has helped me to form all my
other habits, it’s helped me to become more peaceful, more focused, less
worried about discomfort, more appreciative and attentive to everything in my
life. I’m far from perfect, but it has helped me come a long way.
Probably most importantly, it has helped
me understand my own mind. Before I started meditating, I never thought about
what was going on inside my head — it would just happen, and I would follow its
commands like an automaton. These days, all of that still happens, but more and
more, I am aware of what’s going on. I can make a choice about whether to
follow the commands. I understand myself better (not completely, but better),
and that has given me increased flexibility and freedom.
So … I highly recommend this habit. And
while I’m not saying it’s easy, you can start small and get better and better
as you practice. Don’t expect to be good at first — that’s why it’s called
“practice”!
These tips aren’t aimed at helping you to
become an expert … they should help you get started and keep going. You don’t
have to implement them all at once — try a few, come back to this article, try
one or two more.
1.
Sit for just two minutes. This will seem ridiculously easy, to just
meditate for two minutes. That’s perfect. Start with just two minutes a day for
a week. If that goes well, increase by another two minutes and do that for a
week. If all goes well, by increasing just a little at a time, you’ll be
meditating for 10 minutes a day in the 2nd month, which is amazing! But start
small first.
2.
Do it first thing each morning. It’s easy to say, “I’ll meditate every
day,” but then forget to do it. Instead, set a reminder for every morning when
you get up, and put a note that says “meditate” somewhere where you’ll see it.
3.
Don’t get caught up in the how — just do. Most people worry about
where to sit, how to sit, what cushion to use … this is all nice, but it’s not
that important to get started. Start just by sitting on a chair, or on your
couch. Or on your bed. If you’re comfortable on the ground, sit cross-legged.
It’s just for two minutes at first anyway, so just sit. Later you can worry
about optimizing it so you’ll be comfortable for longer, but in the beginning
it doesn’t matter much, just sit somewhere quiet and comfortable.
4.
Check in with how you’re feeling. As you first settle into your meditation
session, simply check to see how you’re feeling. How does your body feel? What
is the quality of your mind? Busy? Tired? Anxious? See whatever you’re bringing
to this meditation session as completely OK.
5.
Count your breaths. Now that you’re settled in, turn your
attention to your breath. Just place the attention on your breath as it comes
in, and follow it through your nose all the way down to your lungs. Try
counting “one” as you take in the first breath, then “two” as you breathe out.
Repeat this to the count of 10, then start again at one.
6.
Come back when you wander. Your mind will wander. This is an almost
absolute certainty. There’s no problem with that. When you notice your mind
wandering, smile, and simply gently return to your breath. Count “one” again,
and start over. You might feel a little frustration, but it’s perfectly OK to
not stay focused, we all do it. This is the practice, and you won’t be good at
it for a little while.
7.
Develop a loving attitude. When you notice thoughts and feelings
arising during meditation, as they will, look at them with a friendly attitude.
See them as friends, not intruders or enemies. They are a part of you, though
not all of you. Be friendly and not harsh.
8.
Don’t worry too much that you’re doing it wrong. You will worry you’re
doing it wrong. That’s OK, we all do. You’re not doing it wrong. There’s no
perfect way to do it, just be happy you’re doing it.
9.
Don’t worry about clearing the mind. Lots of people think
meditation is about clearing your mind, or stopping all thoughts. It’s not.
This can sometimes happen, but it’s not the “goal” of meditation. If you have
thoughts, that’s normal. We all do. Our brains are thought factories, and we
can’t just shut them down. Instead, just try to practice focusing your
attention, and practice some more when your mind wanders.
10. Stay with whatever arises. When thoughts or
feelings arise, and they will, you might try staying with them awhile. Yes, I
know I said to return to the breath, but after you practice that for a week,
you might also try staying with a thought or feeling that arises. We tend to
want to avoid feelings like frustration, anger, anxiety … but an amazingly
useful meditation practice is to stay with the feeling for awhile. Just stay,
and be curious.
11. Get to know yourself. This practice isn’t
just about focusing your attention, it’s about learning how your mind works.
What’s going on inside there? It’s murky, but by watching your mind wander, get
frustrated, avoid difficult feelings … you can start to understand yourself.
12. Become friends with yourself. As you get to know
yourself, do it with a friendly attitude instead of one of criticism. You’re
getting to know a friend. Smile and give yourself love.
13. Do a body scan. Another thing you can
do, once you become a little better at following your breath, is focus your
attention on one body part at a time. Start at the soles of your feet — how do
those feel? Slowly move to your toes, the tops of your feet, your ankles, all
the way to the top of your head.
14. Notice the light, sounds,
energy.
Another place to put
your attention, again, after you’ve practice with your breath for at least a
week, is the light all around you. Just keep your eyes on one spot, and notice
the light in the room you’re in. Another day, just focus on noticing sounds.
Another day, try to notice the energy in the room all around you (including
light and sounds).
15. Really commit yourself. Don’t just say, “Sure,
I’ll try this for a couple days.” Really commit yourself to this. In your mind,
be locked in, for at least a month.
16. You can do it anywhere. If you’re traveling or
something comes up in the morning, you can do meditation in your office. In the
park. During your commute. As you walk somewhere. Sitting meditation is the
best place to start, but in truth, you’re practicing for this kind of
mindfulness in your entire life.
17. Follow guided meditation. If it helps, you can
try following guided meditations to start with. My wife is using Tara Brach’s guided meditations, and she finds them
very helpful.
18. Check in with friends. While I like meditating
alone, you can do it with your spouse or child or a friend. Or just make a
commitment with a friend to check in every morning after meditation. It might
help you stick with it for longer.
19. Find a community. Even better, find a
community of people who are meditating and join them. This might be a Zen or
Tibetan community near you (for example), where you go and meditate with them.
Or find an online group and check in with them and ask questions, get support,
encourage others. My Sea Change Program has
a community like that.
20. Smile when you’re done. When you’re finished
with your two minutes, smile. Be grateful that you had this time to yourself,
that you stuck with your commitment, that you showed yourself that you’re
trustworthy, where you took the time to get to know yourself and make friends
with yourself. That’s an amazing two minutes of your life.
Meditation
isn’t always easy or even peaceful. But it has truly amazing benefits, and you
can start today, and continue for the rest of your life.
Source:Zenhabits
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